Macedonian Humour

[The LION will ROAR]

Cartoon of World Powers Policing Greece

Original caption: 1897: A political cartoon satirizing the trouble that the world's powers (England, Austria, Russia, Germany, Italy, and France), are having in dealing with Greece. Greece is represented as a small boy in traditional costume while the other countries are represented as huge policemen.

The cartoon is labeled, "A small job for six, big policemen."

[The LION will ROAR]

The 10 Commandments of being a good Macedonian housewife (Domakinka)

1. Always put your husband's needs ahead of your own.

2. Learn to mind read what your husband needs at all times; have that beer in his hands before he exhausts himself asking for it.

3. Respect that fact that your husband's parents are more important to him than you are. Your role is to serve them.

4. The housework is always your responsibility, even when you work equivalent or longer hours than your husband. And it must be always spotless.

5. Child rearing is also your responsibility. Your children must turn out well - they must be university educated, preferably doctors or lawyers. If they don't, it's your fault.

6. Dinner should be ready on the table each night when your husband gets home. Frozen meals won't do. The food must be to the standard set by your husband's mother.

7. You should be ready to receive guests at all times, even on weeknights and on Sunday nights when you're just about to go to bed to prepare for the week ahead.And when they come, you must greet them with a smile, fill the table with Mezze, engage in lively conversation with them for as long as they stay. Then you clean up after them, even if it's past midnight.

8. You must live with your in-laws for at least 10 years after you marry. Then you must build yourself a large fancy house with all the latest appointments, and have your in-laws come and live with you into old age.

9. Quickly learn to make maznik and other delights for at least 80 years, as this is how many guests will turn up on any typical occasion. This is just the immediate family.

10. Look young and beautiful while your handling all of the above - your husband must be proud to be seen with you in public.

[Prolet]

Here is a typical mazh wanting a domakinka.

YouTube - Makedonski narodni prikazni - Трампање 2/3

[Bill77]

The 10 Commandments of being a good Macedonian housewife (Domakinka)

1. Always put your husband's needs ahead of your own.

2. Learn to mind read what your husband needs at all times; have that beer in his hands before he exhausts himself asking for it.

3. Respect that fact that your husband's parents are more important to him than you are. Your role is to serve them.

4. The housework is always your responsibility, even when you work equivalent or longer hours than your husband. And it must be always spotless.

5. Child rearing is also your responsibility. Your children must turn out well - they must be university educated, preferably doctors or lawyers. If they don't, it's your fault.

6. Dinner should be ready on the table each night when your husband gets home. Frozen meals won't do. The food must be to the standard set by your husband's mother.

7. You should be ready to receive guests at all times, even on weeknights and on Sunday nights when you're just about to go to bed to prepare for the week ahead.And when they come, you must greet them with a smile, fill the table with Mezze, engage in lively conversation with them for as long as they stay. Then you clean up after them, even if it's past midnight.

8. You must live with your in-laws for at least 10 years after you marry. Then you must build yourself a large fancy house with all the latest appointments, and have your in-laws come and live with you into old age.

9. Quickly learn to make maznik and other delights for at least 80 years, as this is how many guests will turn up on any typical occasion. This is just the immediate family.

10. Look young and beautiful while your handling all of the above - your husband must be proud to be seen with you in public.

LOL This is so funny. But Batka, you are a Dead Man walking. Just whait for the females on this forum to read it. I am going to Put you under the pump, Do you agree with these commandments?

PS: you forgot the 11th Commandment. Women should never get in between the television and the Husband that is waching the football, while she is sweeping the floor. it is very incosiderate to do so.

[Prolet]

Come on Blagojche you agree with him 100% you just wont admit it LOL

It doesnt say that a domakin can cheat on his wife so i guess Jankovska wont be so upset LOL

[The LION will ROAR]

LOL This is so funny. But Batka, you are a Dead Man walking. Just whait for the females on this forum to read it. I am going to Put you under the pump, Do you agree with these commandments?

PS: you forgot the 11th Commandment. Women should never get in between the television and the Husband that is waching the football, while she is sweeping the floor. it is very incosiderate to do so.

Hey Bill77, We all wish we could have it this way, but as modern times are moving forward and things are changing, there is no more even a 50/50 equal rights at home...
It's 80/20 for the women side..lol
As I see happening more and more with the Australian - Macedonian Men, they are becoming more of a soft C#@K these days, sorry to say.. As the saying goes " pu##y whipped"....lol
I think the Macedonian men in Macedonia still have the power and the last say..lol

[The LION will ROAR]

LOL This is so funny. But Batka, you are a Dead Man walking. Just whait for the females on this forum to read it. I am going to Put you under the pump, Do you agree with these commandments?

PS: you forgot the 11th Commandment. Women should never get in between the television and the Husband that is waching the football, while she is sweeping the floor. it is very incosiderate to do so.

The 11th Commandment must be added..lol
My pet hate is when they want to talk while your watching TV or on the Internet...#@%@%.. problem is it doesn't leave much time for talking...lol

[Bill77]

The 11th Commandment must be added..lol
My pet hate is when they want to talk while your watching TV or on the Internet...#@%@%.. problem is it doesn't leave much time for talking...lol

Yeh, mine has This uncanny habit of doing it exactly when a goal is scored then i have to whait for the replay. She has plenty of time to clean..... The nerve

[The LION will ROAR]

Yeh, mine has This uncanny habit of doing it exactly when a goal is scored then i have to whait for the replay. She has plenty of time to clean..... The nerve

Hey Bill77, We can start a whole new thread on complaints and pet hates..But we should stop here as we wouldn't be popular to some...lol

[Spartan]

I sectioned off a portion of my basement for this very reason. When Im in there watching football, I am not to be disturbed - house rule #1 !

[Soldier of Macedon]

Just make sure your women don't have spyware fellas, otherwise you may be spending more time in the basement than initially intended, lol....

[Bill77]

This Joke i will tell in Part Macedonian and parts in English.

Two friends go out fishing for the day.
They are sitting on the banks of the river,
And after a while, The first Guy comments.

"ehhh ovaj e zivot. nie dvajcata zivot zivejeme,
ama se chudam, zenite nashi shto prat doma".

The second Guy replies,
"Eh, ili pletat......Ili se ebavat"

The first Guy looks at the second Guy Stunned,
Then quick as a flash he tries to wind his rod in,
gives up half way and just toss's it in the water,
Picks up his tackle box and runs towards the car.

The second guy is bewildered by all this and screams
out to the first guy that is bolting towards the car,
"cojek, sto se brzas, sto e rabotata?"

The first Guy screams out
"mojata ne znaj da pleti"

[Bij]

hahahahaha bill. good one.

as for lion, i whole heartedly disagree with your assessment of men. the men in macedonia are 100% bigger softcocks than the aussie-maks.

[The LION will ROAR]

Tooo Funny bill...pmlpmlpml

And Bij Men overall are becomming more softcocks in general and you are wrong about Macedonian men in Macedonia they still have the upper hand and have the last say....Not sure what part of Macedonia your talking about...?

[Bij]

Tooo Funny bill...pmlpmlpml

And Bij Men overall are becomming more softcocks in general and you are wrong about Macedonian men in Macedonia they still have the upper hand and have the last say....Not sure what part of Macedonia your talking about...?

mate, i was all over macedonia. i was served like a princess by all of my guy friends. i did not lift ONE finger while i was there. didn't matter if they were from skopje, strumica, bitola, prilep or ohrid. i had guys washing my underwear and ironing my sheets. that was the life!

all of them pretended to be macho and all 'id hit my woman if she did this or that' but stand up to them one little tiny bit and they backed down like bitches.

macedonian men in aussie land (the most) are raised by mummy to do nothing. my brother in law did the vacuuming once and couldnt figure out how to get the chord back in, so he wrapped it around the vacuum lol