where's the drinks i thought they were on the house.
Macedonian Humour
Collapse
X
-
"Ido not want an uprising of people that would leave me at the first failure, I want revolution with citizens able to bear all the temptations to a prolonged struggle, what, because of the fierce political conditions, will be our guide or cattle to the slaughterhouse"
GOTSE DELCEV
-
-
A German, an American, and a greek. The challenge
is who can survive the longest in a room with 500 pound gorilla.
So the American goes first. After 2 seconds the American comes
out with his clothes ripped off screaming and rubbing his ass.
The German looks at him and laughs. "You American pussy, he says
and goes in. But not even a second he comes out naked screaming,
"Ah my aaasssss!"
The last one is the greek. So he goes in. Five minutes go by
and he's not coming out. Ten minutes, 20 minutes, 30
minutes...after one hour he comes out, without even a scratch on
him. Everybody is amazed. After 5 seconds the gorilla comes
out and in a soft voice says, "Are you coming back"?The Macedonians originates it, the Bulgarians imitate it and the Greeks exploit it!
Comment
-
-
A Greek man moved to the USA and married an American girl.
Although his English was far from perfect, they got along very well.
One day he rushed into a lawyer's office
and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him.
The lawyer said that getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances,
and asked him the following questions:
Have you any grounds?
Yes, an acre and half and nice little home.
No, I mean what is the foundation of this case?
It made of concrete.
I don't think you understand.
Does either of you have a real grudge?
No, we have carport, and not need one.
I mean what are your relations like?
All my relations still in Greece .
Is there any infidelity in your marriage?
We have hi-fidelity stereo and good DVD player.
Does your wife beat you up?
No, I always up before her.
Why do you want this divorce?
She going to kill me.
What makes you think that?
I got proof.
What kind of proof?
She going to poison me.
She buy a bottle at shop.
I can read English pretty good, and it say:
~~~ Grease Remover ~~~The Macedonians originates it, the Bulgarians imitate it and the Greeks exploit it!
Comment
-
-
that is good."Ido not want an uprising of people that would leave me at the first failure, I want revolution with citizens able to bear all the temptations to a prolonged struggle, what, because of the fierce political conditions, will be our guide or cattle to the slaughterhouse"
GOTSE DELCEV
Comment
-
-
Russell Crowe flies to Athens to watch a young greek play rugby league and is suitably impressed and arranges for him to come over to South Sydney .He's signed to a one-year contract and the kid joins the team for the pre-season.
Two weeks later Rabbits are down 10 nil to Easts with only 10 minutes left. Coach Bas gives the young greek the nod and he goes in. The kid is a sensation - scores 3 tries in 10 minutes and wins the game for South Sydney ! The fans are thrilled, the players and coaches are delighted, and the media are in love with the new star. When the player comes off the ground he phones his mum to tell her about his first day of Australian Rugby League. ‘Hello mum, guess what?' he says. 'I played for 10 minutes today, we were 10 nil down, but I scored 3 tries and we won. Everybody loves me, the fans, the media...
'Wonderful,' says his mum, 'Let me tell you about my day. Your father lost his job and robbed, your sister and I were ambushed, raped and beaten in the street, and your brother has joined a gang of looters, and all while you were having such great time. ...
‘The young greek is very upset..
'What can I say mum, I'm so sorry.
''Sorry? You're sorry?' says his mum, 'It's your fault we moved to Redfern in the first place!'The Macedonians originates it, the Bulgarians imitate it and the Greeks exploit it!
Comment
-
-
The current Greek banking crisis explained...
Stavros bought a donkey from a farmer for €100. The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day.
The next day he drove up and said, 'Sorry, but I have some bad news. The donkey's died.'
Stavros replied, 'Well then just give me my money back.'
The farmer said, 'Can't do that. I've already spent it.'
Stavros said, 'OK, then, just bring me the dead donkey.'
The farmer asked, 'What are you going to do with him?'
Stavros said, 'I'm going to raffle him off.'
The farmer said, 'You can't raffle a dead donkey!'
Stavros said, 'Sure I can. Watch me. I just won't tell anybody he's dead.'
A month later, the farmer met up with Stavros and asked, 'What happened with that dead donkey?'
Stavros said, 'I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at €2 each and made a profit of €898'
The farmer said, 'Didn't anyone complain?'
Stavros said, 'Just the guy who won, so I gave him his €2 back.'
Stavros now works for the IMF .http://www.macedoniantruth.org/forum/showthread.php?p=120873#post120873
Comment
-
-
you know that australia gave theimf 6billion dollars to help the eu in 'it's debt crisis.That was borrowed money we still have to pay back the interest & capital."Ido not want an uprising of people that would leave me at the first failure, I want revolution with citizens able to bear all the temptations to a prolonged struggle, what, because of the fierce political conditions, will be our guide or cattle to the slaughterhouse"
GOTSE DELCEV
Comment
-
-
Originally posted by Bill77 View PostThe current Greek banking crisis explained...
Stavros bought a donkey from a farmer for €100. The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day.
The next day he drove up and said, 'Sorry, but I have some bad news. The donkey's died.'
Stavros replied, 'Well then just give me my money back.'
The farmer said, 'Can't do that. I've already spent it.'
Stavros said, 'OK, then, just bring me the dead donkey.'
The farmer asked, 'What are you going to do with him?'
Stavros said, 'I'm going to raffle him off.'
The farmer said, 'You can't raffle a dead donkey!'
Stavros said, 'Sure I can. Watch me. I just won't tell anybody he's dead.'
A month later, the farmer met up with Stavros and asked, 'What happened with that dead donkey?'
Stavros said, 'I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at €2 each and made a profit of €898'
The farmer said, 'Didn't anyone complain?'
Stavros said, 'Just the guy who won, so I gave him his €2 back.'
Stavros now works for the IMF .
ahahaha lele se nasmejav koga go procitavСтравот на Атина од овој Македонец одел до таму што го нарекле „Страшниот Чакаларов“ „гркоубиец“ и „крвожеден комитаџија“.
„Ако знам дека тука тече една капка грчка крв, јас сега би ја отсекол целата рака и би ја фрлил в море.“ Васил Чакаларов
Comment
-
-
A professor at Wayne State University in Detroit was giving a lecture on Paranormal Studies.
To get a feel for his audience, he asks, "How many people here believe in ghosts?"
About 90 students raise their hands.
"Well, that's a good start. Out of those who believe in ghosts, do any of you think you have seen a ghost?"
About 40 students raise their hands.
"That's really good. I'm really glad you take this seriously. Has anyone here ever talked to a ghost?"
About 15 students raise their hand.
"Has anyone here ever touched a ghost?"
Three students raise their hands.
"That's fantastic. Now let me ask you one question further...Have any of you ever made love to a ghost?"
Way in the back, Spiro raises his hand.
The professor takes off his glasses and says, "Son, all the years I've been giving this lecture, no one has ever claimed to have made love to a ghost. You've got to come up here and tell us about your experience."
The Greek exchange student replied with a nod and a grin, and began to make his way up to the podium. When he reached the front of the room, the professor asks, "So, Spiro , tell us what it's like to have sex with a ghost?"
Spiro replied, "Shit, from way back there I thought you said Goats."
Comment
-
-
Предмет: Моето CV
До: ДОО *****
Почитувани,
Моето име е Александар ******** и можам да кажам дека сум потполно неподготвен за работа и немам досегашно работно искуство (затоа што негде морам да почнам со работа, за да имам).
Под притисок и со прекувремена работа нема добро да се снајдам, освен ако не сум дебело платен.
Искрено, ме заболе за целите на вашата компанија ако со платата не можам да ги покријам сите тековни трошоци, плус и нешто да ми остане за гардероба, излегување...
Функционирам според принципот “Колку пари – толку музика.“
Исто така, не ме интересира што сте во проблеми и очекувам сите обврски кои ви се предвидени со закон да ги извршите на време, како и тоа да ги почитувате сите празници и да добивам годишен одмор.
Факт е дека ќе ве напуштам штом ми се пружи подобра шанса.
Комуникативен сум со пристојни и љубезни личности, за заебанти имам краток фитил.
Пцујам на неколку светски јазици.
Студирав 100 години, но сметам дека е успех што воопшто и завршив факултет во оваа земја, каква што е.
Се усовршувам постојано и без вас, затоа што сум љубопитна личност и мислам дека животот има смисла и без скапување на работа.
Реагирам само на позитивна стимулација. Немојте да ме гушите со тестирање и тимски глупости. Ако веќе се стремите за такви западњачки стандарди, тогаш понудете и западњачка плата и услови за работа. Тоа што сте посетиле два, три семинари - не ве прави модерна европска фирма.
Што не знам – ќе научам. Не сум дебил.
И да, постојат работи кои во животот сум ги правел од чист ентузијазам, но жалам што морам да ве информирам дека тоа не важи и за работата која Вие ја нудите.
Со почит,
Александар ********
Comment
-
-
Ново лого на Министерството за Шумарство
По подолги анализи, Министерството за шумарство на РМ пронајде лого, преку кое на секој човек треба да му стане совршено јасно дека главната дејност на институцијата и' се - дрвата.
here is it: http://off.net.mk/zezalici/foto/novo...-za-shumarstvo
Comment
-
Comment