Macedonian Humour

[The LION will ROAR]

There was an international competition for the best book about Monkey's.
France submitted a lavishly illustrated volume titled "Love triangles in the Monkey' families."
England presented a treatise "Monkey's and the World Trade."
Germany submitted 24 volume set under the title "Introduction into Monkeyology."
The USA furnished one million copies of a leaflet announcing a sweepstakes, "Win a Monkey. No purchase necessary."
The Greek wrote a book Titled "4000 years of Greek Monkey's".

[The LION will ROAR]

A Greek man parked his car in the Parliament House in Athens. A policeman rushed to him, shouting, "Are you crazy? Here is where the Politicians work!"
"No problem," the Greek man answered, "I've good locks in my car."

[The LION will ROAR]

A Greek guard asked a political prisoner, "What is your term?"
Prisoner: "Ten years."
Guard: "What for?"
Prisoner "For nothing."
Guard "What a lie! For nothing they give only five years."

[The LION will ROAR]

A Greek Politician came to visit a lunatics asylum. To greet them, a choir of the patients sang a song from a popular movie that says "Oh, how good it is to live in Greece!"
The Greek Politician noticed that one of the men did not sing.
"Why are you not singing?"
"I'm not crazy, I'm a nurse here."

[The LION will ROAR]

Two former Greek schoolmates met in the street in Athens.
"Where do you work?"
"I am a school teacher. And what about you?"
"I work for the under cover Police."
"Oh, and what do you do as a under cover policeman?"
"We unearth those who are dissatisfied."
"You mean, there are also some who are satisfied?"

[The LION will ROAR]

TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING GREEK

1. You get to shout about your culture although the only real culture most Greeks have is what is growing between their toes.
2. The police are even more corrupt than the criminals they are supposed to be chasing.
3. You can blow your nose in the street by pinching it between the thumb and forefinger and trumpeting forth without everyone around retching their stomach contents up at the sight.
4. Old women can sport moustaches.
5. Young women can sport moustaches.
6. Men can be hairier than the average grizzly bear and not get put in a zoo.
7. You get to call the bouzouki a musical instrument when the rest of the world sees it as an instrument of torture.
8. You are the only nation to have lost its marbles and still wants to let everyone else around the world know about it.
9. Ridiculous bureaucracy.
10. Nana Mouskouri and Demis Roussos.

[The LION will ROAR]

According to a recent Greek government publication ...
A billion seconds ago KARAMANLIS was president.
A billion minutes ago was just after the time of Christ.
A billion hours ago man had not yet walked on earth.
A billion dollars ago was late yesterday at the ATHENS Treasury...

[The LION will ROAR]

The Greek myth is that every boy can grow up to be Greek GOD!.
Karamanlis reality now is that the boy doesn't have to grow up?!

[The LION will ROAR]

A little girl asked her father, "Daddy? Do all Fairy Tales begin with 'Once Upon A GREEK'?"

[NikodimMKD]

LWR...just out of curiousity. Don't you have any other Macedonian jokes that talk about anything else than the greaks?

You seem a "tad" obsessed with the neoTurks...

[The LION will ROAR]

LWR...just out of curiousity. Don't you have any other Macedonian jokes that talk about anything else than the greaks?

You seem a "tad" obsessed with the neoTurks...

.
I don't make jokes. I just Observe the Greeks and report the facts.



P.S. If you go thru them you'll find some on Macedonians

[The LION will ROAR]

At the height of a Greek political corruption trial, the prosecuting attorney attacked a witness. "Isn't it true," he bellowed, "that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?"
The witness stared out the window, as though he hadn't heard the question.
"Isn't it true that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?" the lawyer repeated. The witness still did not respond.
Finally, the judge leaned over and said, "Sir, please answer the question."
"Oh," the startled witness said, "I thought he was talking to you."

[The LION will ROAR]

Soldier Papadopealouss was ordered to peel a barrel of potatos.
- In this day and age, the army should have a machine to peel potatos, complains Papadopealouss .
- Absolutely, answered the sergeant. And you are its latest model.

[The LION will ROAR]

Question: What is permitted and what is prohibited?
Answer: In England, what is permitted, is permitted, and what is prohibited, is prohibited.
In America everything is permitted except for what is prohibited.
In Germany everything is prohibited except for what is permitted.
In France everything is permitted, even what is prohibited.
In Greece everything is prohibited, even what is permitted.

[The LION will ROAR]

A 10pm curfew was imposed in Athens.
Everybody had to be off the streets or risk being shot. However one citizen was shot at 9.45pm.
"Why did you do that?" the Police was asked by his superior officer.
"I know where he lives," he replied, "and he wouldn't have made it."