Dating Macedonian Women

[mac4life2]

BTW(I've noticed only this in America, no where else per-say). I've noticed alot of Macedonian females don't care to date other Macedonian men and vis verusa. Why is it so hard to date another Macedonian women being an attractive Macedonian-American US soldier male mid 20's who works out a lot? Where do you Macedonians find other Macedonians to date? And if not, do you guys marry/date outside the Balkan circles? I'm just curious to ask because I was with a half black and half white girl for almost 2 years before I left to go deploy. So help me out here, I might have been away from home for a long time.

[Gocka]

You are right, it is a thing. Same thing in NJ, Macedonian women don't date Macedonian men. Here is why.

Macedonian men are mama's boys, they are childish and are used to their mom's cooking, cleaning, doing their laundry, picking up after them.

Macedonian men tend to be very rude, cocky and overly macho types. They don't have respect for women.

Macedonian women in the USA, tend to be well educated, more educated then the men actually. So how many well educated women are going to want to date, childish, rude uneducated men?

Then you have the gossip factor. If they date Macedonian men, everyone will know about it. If they date out of Macedonian circles they can keep relationships hidden.


So if you want to date a Macedonian woman, you have to overcome those predisposition they have about Macedonian men. If you are persistent and put your best foot forward, you should be able to overcome them. Just don't act like their fathers and you should be ok.

BTW(I've noticed only this in America, no where else per-say). I've noticed alot of Macedonian females don't care to date other Macedonian men and vis verusa. Why is it so hard to date another Macedonian women being an attractive Macedonian-American US soldier male mid 20's who works out a lot? Where do you Macedonians find other Macedonians to date? And if not, do you guys marry/date outside the Balkan circles? I'm just curious to ask because I was with a half black and half white girl for almost 2 years before I left to go deploy. So help me out here, I might have been away from home for a long time.

[mac4life2]

I appreciate that word of advice, my parents wanted me to go to Macedonia to find a women. Yeah right, I have no time to restart my life and readjust to another countries living, I love Macedonia. But I will be an outcast once I get there, I'd be fighting to fit in, let alone find a women. Lol... Thank you Gocka.

[Risto the Great]

If the macedonian women can't do what the mothers do, why bother with them? The world has gone mad.

[Gocka]

That's a whole different matter.

What I mean is dont be like

"Kurvo kaj mi e jadejneto"

If the macedonian women can't do what the mothers do, why bother with them? The world has gone mad.

[Risto the Great]

You mean don't say it out loud?

What I mean is dont be like

"Kurvo kaj mi e jadejneto"

[Gocka]

hahahahaha lmao.

Just as I'm reading that, my wife walks by and see's me giggling like a child. Of course wants to know whats so funny, which only makes me giggle harder. She just shook her head and walked away eventually.

You mean don't say it out loud?

[Liberator of Makedonija]

Seems different in Australia, dating between Macedonians is common.

[Gocka]

Assimilation is faster and more thorough in the USA. I've noticed Australian Macedonians have tighter knit communities and practice traditional customs more commonly. Starting with my generation, marriage between Macedonians is becoming less common. It tends to be the women. They are more likely to want to shy away from their roots and culture than the men.

Seems different in Australia, dating between Macedonians is common.

[Starling]

If the macedonian women can't do what the mothers do, why bother with them? The world has gone mad.

Why would you want your wife to be your new mother? Relationships need to be on equal ground in order to work and expecting your spouse to look after you rather than collaborate as equals sharing your lives together generally makes you undesirable to women.

Most women aren't particularly fond of the house wife stereotype and prefer to have paid income. Since this thread is about wanting to date someone that shares your heritage, try finding someone at Macedonian events. As for the issue of assimilation, start conversations about why remembering and preserving our culture is important, be active in the community and teach the younger generation why they should care about it and how to recognize assimilation and issues in that regard. The french speaking community continues to thrive in Canada precisely because concerns of assimilation and how to deal with that are almost constantly a topic of discussion. Also pretty much all my uncles on my mom's side of the family married women of varied backgrounds, which isn't necessarily a bad thing. Just teach your kids not to neglect their Macedonian heritage and to be proud of it and you'll manage. Multi-ethnic backgrounds are the norm these days and the Jewish community manages just fine despite most of them having little resemblance to their semitic ancestors from so many years of intermixing with other groups. Likewise there are native american communities with mixed heritage and they manage too.

[Risto the Great]

I would assume most want to marry Macedonian women because they hope they can continue with much of their culture. If the younger wives can't contribute to the home in the way many of our mothers have, then they are on an equal playing field with all the other women. So, aside from genetics, I can't see the reason to marry one since they have already abandoned their culture.

I've told my sons I would rather they married someone that was deeply in love with them than a Macedonian girl who seems nice.

I was chatting to a guy from New York and he said he simply has no chance to meet women there. He isn't wealthy and he isn't Jewish. Basically no chance.

[Starling]

I by 'contributing to the household' you mean keeping Macedonian culture alive, then being clearer about that will avoid confusion for expecting them to be a stereotypical housewife in a day and age where parents work and share parental responsibilities.

Awfully quick to just declare women the problem rather than it being a general issue within the Macedonian community itself, which from what I've seen seems to be the issue. Macedonian men are just as capable of neglecting their culture and I know for a fact that some do.

A relationship is a collaborative effort, so everyone involved needs to collaborate to make it work. You want to date/marry a woman who can help teach your children about their Macedonian heritage? Look for someone who can. You're not going to get a date while lamenting about how women are a lost cause at the same time. That kind of thing tends to be a bad sign that the person you're talking to is likely to lead to an unhealthy relationship so a lot of women who may have otherwise considered dating you would likely avoid you instead. Just give them the benefit of the doubt as you get to know them and judge all you want if you find that to be the case for that particular person. Find yourself a place where you can ask them about what they think about Macedonian culture early on and bond over that before you actually get serious.

[Risto the Great]

I think a modern stereotype of a woman/wife has absolutely nothing to do with the 1950's if that helps. My wife is Macedonian. Possibly the last of a dying breed. Keeps the house alive with a smile on her face and does the same with my office also. And has her tertiary qualification. And makes lovely p'lnati Piperki.

Just saying that if finding a Macedonian woman who is simply an American is the objective, it's probably not going to be worth it. If she has retained some good core Macedonian values, maybe she is worth it.

Either way, given the limited quantity, I'd prioritise true love.

[Gocka]

Macedonian women are part of the problem not so much because they don't want to be stereotypical housewives, but because they more readily do things like stop speaking Macedonian, stop socializing with other Macedonians, and shy away from their traditional customs and culture. I think a lot of it is due to a perception of Macedonianism as inferior and outdated. Macedonian men are much more likely at least in the USA, to use Macedonian as their primary language, and keep Macedonian friends. Just look at this forum from it's inception, how many female members, 5 ever? I've never met a Macedonian girl who cares about history, politics, or nationalism. That has to mean something, and it goes far beyond gender politics.

Just as our culture has raised a bunch of mama's boys, it had also raised a bunch of eniteled princesses.

[Starling]

Well I was raised in a french community and was never told where I could find and socialize with Macedonians nor taught more than a few Macedonian words, my brother doesn't know shit or give a shit and that's pretty much my dad's fault for leaving us to manage on our own past "you have Macedonian heritage" and a few vague details on the basics. Kinda hard to keep the culture alive when you have to teach it to yourself. I didn't get the impression my uncles did much either but I haven't seen them in years. Basically I know from experience that there's some negligence going on with Macedonian men too. I have an aunt I hear is fairly active in the Macedonian community but family drama and lack of contact information's kept me from really knowing much of my dad's side of the family and it's not like I have a lot of direct relatives there to begin with.

Now, just because my personal experience is with my mostly male relatives not doing much doesn't mean I'd just declare it a problem with men and call it a day. A single person's experience is limited and not really a big enough sample pool to get reliable statistics out of. Even if we could chart out that women do have as high a rate of not caring about Macedonian culture as assumed we'd be better off treating it like a general community problem than a gender one as it's applicable to everyone and a problem that goes beyond gender even if the stats vary along them. So basically, how do we get more Macedonians to care about their culture and heritage than the ones who currently do? That seems to be the root problem here.