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Risto:
I commend you for taking the generally positive attitude about our Macedonian heritage. And I don't think any less of you for not being as open to dancing to Serb/Greek/Bulgar music at your wedding. I don't think I will have any at my wedding. However, I think my main disagreement with you here has been on what other people do at their own celebratory events and how that affects their Macedonian identity. I would argue that if their dedication to their Macedonian identity is already shaky before their weddings, Macedonia and the Macedonian cause is not technically losing anything by them playing Serb/Greek/Bulgar music at their weddings. I'd say their shaky identity stems from well before their weddings..somewhere in their childhood, probably. Thus, looking down on someone for how they celebrate their own wedding isn't really addressing any sort of problem, and rather, can cause further divisions and alienation. Sure, people (like children) at their wedding will hear that Serb/Greek/Bulgar music. However, a once-in-a-while event won't harm the child's identity...but if all the "Macedonian" weddings he's going to is playing tons of Serb/Greek/Bulgar music, then it is likely there is a bigger influence (educational and familial) on his identity, in which music at a celebratory event plays only one small part. Addressing the music is like addressing a symptom. The virus is still there and a new symptom will pop up somewhere else.
As far as Vardar Macedonians not rejecting many "Srbomani" to the extent that Egejci do the same about "Grkomani" is clear: history of the two regions since World War 2. While Macedonians in Greece were being executed, exiled and expelled for simply thinking in another foreign tongue, Macedonians in Yugoslavia had work, land, the language was being recognized, the church was being recognized, they were represented in government as an equal, and so forth. The Macedonians who were born in Vardar after WW2 did not witness no where near the horrors of those in Ejeska. I think it is expected that they would look at Serbs (and other Yugoslavs) with less ill-will then other Macedonians do; and further, openly embrace the Yugo-nostalgija. Vardar Macedonians have had it good compared to the rest of the Macedonians in the past 60 years...except in relations with Albanians. I've actually heard discussions within the Diaspora between Toronto and Chicago Macedonians and Detroit Macedonians about similar topics. Detroit Macedonians are generally friendly with Greeks; Toronto and Chicago Macedonians, not as much. Further, they don't understand the extent of the violence that Detroit saw between Macedonians and Albanians in the 1990s and 2000s (though, a lot of this was Macedonian and Serbians against Albanians).
Different groups of people within Macedonia have different triggers, and different groups have different ideas of what their identity means to them. Lot of Tetovcani I've talked to who may say they are Macedonian or Serbian are really neither strongly Macedonian nor Serbian, but VERY strongly Tetovcani. Should that be give up to celebrate Macedonianism or Serbianism? I say no, because I appreciate that kind of diversity that's more localized than "ethnicity."
But I don't think it's as bad as you think (in certain parts of the Diaspora, at least). I don't know of any Macedonians in the Detroit area who go to Serb dance or language school (and only a few Macedonians go to the Serb church because when they came here, there was no Macedonian church, and they just wanted to stick with the same church for whatever reason). But I do remember a couple of years ago Macedonian language classes at the cultural center had at least 70 children enrolled in it. Keep in mind these Detroit Macedonians are overwhelmingly Tetovcani, with some Prespani and Bitolcani...RoMacedonians.
I don't see this as about being progressive and liberated. Personally, I'm enraged by the Americanization and electronicization of practically all of Eastern Europe's main music scene (even though I like some of it). I'm also very weary and cautious of ideas like the "EU", where we all will become "one". And I'm disgusted by how the "over-consumption" culture is taking root in Macedonia and the rest of the Balkans. I'm more of a anarchist than a totalitarian, and I'd rather see thousands of small countries than massive unions. It would help preserve the diversity. But I might be progressive in the sense that I've tried my best to rid myself of the ill-will toward surrounding Balkan peoples, and draw a line between politics and culture (even though I understand those lines can be blurry). If I felt that embracing another culture would take away from my identity, I'd do something about it.
Bottom line: I just don't think that for MOST Macedonians, playing some Serb/Greek/Bulgar music at their wedding is a strong indicator of a degradation of the Macedonian identity, if it's an indicator at all.
I commend you for taking the generally positive attitude about our Macedonian heritage. And I don't think any less of you for not being as open to dancing to Serb/Greek/Bulgar music at your wedding. I don't think I will have any at my wedding. However, I think my main disagreement with you here has been on what other people do at their own celebratory events and how that affects their Macedonian identity. I would argue that if their dedication to their Macedonian identity is already shaky before their weddings, Macedonia and the Macedonian cause is not technically losing anything by them playing Serb/Greek/Bulgar music at their weddings. I'd say their shaky identity stems from well before their weddings..somewhere in their childhood, probably. Thus, looking down on someone for how they celebrate their own wedding isn't really addressing any sort of problem, and rather, can cause further divisions and alienation. Sure, people (like children) at their wedding will hear that Serb/Greek/Bulgar music. However, a once-in-a-while event won't harm the child's identity...but if all the "Macedonian" weddings he's going to is playing tons of Serb/Greek/Bulgar music, then it is likely there is a bigger influence (educational and familial) on his identity, in which music at a celebratory event plays only one small part. Addressing the music is like addressing a symptom. The virus is still there and a new symptom will pop up somewhere else.
As far as Vardar Macedonians not rejecting many "Srbomani" to the extent that Egejci do the same about "Grkomani" is clear: history of the two regions since World War 2. While Macedonians in Greece were being executed, exiled and expelled for simply thinking in another foreign tongue, Macedonians in Yugoslavia had work, land, the language was being recognized, the church was being recognized, they were represented in government as an equal, and so forth. The Macedonians who were born in Vardar after WW2 did not witness no where near the horrors of those in Ejeska. I think it is expected that they would look at Serbs (and other Yugoslavs) with less ill-will then other Macedonians do; and further, openly embrace the Yugo-nostalgija. Vardar Macedonians have had it good compared to the rest of the Macedonians in the past 60 years...except in relations with Albanians. I've actually heard discussions within the Diaspora between Toronto and Chicago Macedonians and Detroit Macedonians about similar topics. Detroit Macedonians are generally friendly with Greeks; Toronto and Chicago Macedonians, not as much. Further, they don't understand the extent of the violence that Detroit saw between Macedonians and Albanians in the 1990s and 2000s (though, a lot of this was Macedonian and Serbians against Albanians).
Different groups of people within Macedonia have different triggers, and different groups have different ideas of what their identity means to them. Lot of Tetovcani I've talked to who may say they are Macedonian or Serbian are really neither strongly Macedonian nor Serbian, but VERY strongly Tetovcani. Should that be give up to celebrate Macedonianism or Serbianism? I say no, because I appreciate that kind of diversity that's more localized than "ethnicity."
But I don't think it's as bad as you think (in certain parts of the Diaspora, at least). I don't know of any Macedonians in the Detroit area who go to Serb dance or language school (and only a few Macedonians go to the Serb church because when they came here, there was no Macedonian church, and they just wanted to stick with the same church for whatever reason). But I do remember a couple of years ago Macedonian language classes at the cultural center had at least 70 children enrolled in it. Keep in mind these Detroit Macedonians are overwhelmingly Tetovcani, with some Prespani and Bitolcani...RoMacedonians.
I don't see this as about being progressive and liberated. Personally, I'm enraged by the Americanization and electronicization of practically all of Eastern Europe's main music scene (even though I like some of it). I'm also very weary and cautious of ideas like the "EU", where we all will become "one". And I'm disgusted by how the "over-consumption" culture is taking root in Macedonia and the rest of the Balkans. I'm more of a anarchist than a totalitarian, and I'd rather see thousands of small countries than massive unions. It would help preserve the diversity. But I might be progressive in the sense that I've tried my best to rid myself of the ill-will toward surrounding Balkan peoples, and draw a line between politics and culture (even though I understand those lines can be blurry). If I felt that embracing another culture would take away from my identity, I'd do something about it.
Bottom line: I just don't think that for MOST Macedonians, playing some Serb/Greek/Bulgar music at their wedding is a strong indicator of a degradation of the Macedonian identity, if it's an indicator at all.
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